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[10 Jun 2004|05:28pm] |
Well. I am saying goodbye now because my parents will be home in five minutes, then it's off to Wal-Mart. And then I will be picked up by Ariels parents and off we go! So, goodbye, have a nice weekend and I will see some of you on Sunday at Josh's.
Have fun without me, and listen to lots of Cursive.
PS. Danny, I wish you the best on tour. Please take care of yourself. Have fun and good luck. I will miss you! xoxo
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[09 Jun 2004|11:49am] |
I'm not really sure what's going on. I'm not sure how I feel about anything or anyone right now. I just don't know anymore.
Why can't I just try to be happy without you? Why am I shielding myself from everyone and everything but you? I guess I love you so much that it wouldn't feel so true if I didn't devote my heart to you. That didn't make sense.
What I guess I'm trying to say is I can't be happy unless it's with you and I don't think I want to be happy unless it's with you. Pathetic? Yeah, I knew it.
Sigh my life.
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[09 Jun 2004|12:17am] |
Holy reptile! Hahaha. I feel all fluttery inside. Pretty lame but oh well. It feels nice.
Thank you. You know who you are.
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[08 Jun 2004|08:42pm] |
I hate missing you but telling myself I don't. I hate not feeling anything at all for anyone even remotely because you destroyed all that was left inside of me. Lately it doesn't even feel like there's anything left inside of me. When I see you I don't feel sad anymore. It's like I'm dead inside. And I think I am.
Blah. I don't even know what I'm saying.
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[08 Jun 2004|04:31pm] |
Thursday I leave for Carlsbad. I will be gone until Saturday and I will miss everyone and I'm sure I'll be hating every moment spent away. I have to go caving with some people so they can make a video to be shown at middle and highschools all over. How embarassing.
So, my trip to Carlsbad means no piercings, and no Love Is Red. Bummer like a mother. I don't really care about the show (yes, I wanted to go but it won't impact my life if I do or don't), but I really wanted to go get my piercings but I guess it'll have to wait until Sunday or something. Blagh. Um. That's all.
Edit: I'm fucking pissed. I'm going to also miss The Coma Recovery/Kidcrash house show. Grrrr. Two of my favorite bands. Fuck caving.
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[07 Jun 2004|10:44pm] |
I FUCKING HATE YOUR GUTS.
I'm better. I don't care if I'm not the prettiest girl in the world. I'M BETTER AND YOU KNOW IT. Jesus Christ! I win at life, she loses! One of these days I'm going to show you just how cute and perfect we were.
Deep down inside you know it's the truth. Everyone knows it. I win I win I win. Fuck you.
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[07 Jun 2004|07:38pm] |
I'm sorry for the trouble I probably cause, but my new screen name is before i revolve. Last change or you're free to never speak to me again. Please add it and delete all my other names.
Thanks. Also, everyone should listen to "If You Don't, Don't" by Jimmy Eat World.
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[07 Jun 2004|02:08pm] |
Life is great right now and I can't even put my finger on a reason why. But I guess that's what makes it even more great. You only live once, and should never take that for granted.
Sigh.
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[06 Jun 2004|01:34am] |
I decided tonight that you no longer affect me. Isn't that awesome? So have a nice life, or atleast try. You made the call, and frankly I think it was a really bad one. Oh well. I lose at life. You win.
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[04 Jun 2004|02:25pm] |
I realized that I may never be happy again. Everything is false and fake and empty and meaningless.
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[31 May 2004|12:33pm] |
If you were here we'd lay on the trampoline and eat popsicles. Then we'd wrestle and you'd let me win.
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[31 May 2004|12:16am] |
Right now:
a.) I wish I lived far away
b.) I wish I wasn't me
c.) I wish I was taking care of you
d.) All of the above
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[30 May 2004|10:25pm] |
When am I going to learn my fucking lesson and not look in his direction. It only hurts me more than pretending he doesn't exist (which he does so well with me- or maybe it's not pretending anymore).
Fuck my life. Once again. This was the first time it got to the point of me crying. How pathetic. I wanted someone to punch me in the face. But who got punched instead? Yeah. I wish I was the one who got punched so maybe some sense would be knocked into me. But no, I'm still stupid.
I don't know. I think after Cursive I'm done. I can't handle it anymore. And tonight his eyes were warm. There was a heart beating inside of that chest. For the first time he didn't seem empty. And I think that's what kills me...feeling like I existed for half a second.
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[29 May 2004|04:00pm] |
Thanks for making me smile even if that wasn't your intention.
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[28 May 2004|03:18pm] |
Do it.
3 Things You Like About Me
1.
2.
3.
3 Things You Dislike About Me
1.
2.
3.
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[28 May 2004|10:40am] |
Definitely not worth it.
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[25 May 2004|11:45am] |
I don't think you're worth it anymore. Who am I kidding? You're worth everything and then some.
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[22 May 2004|11:58am] |
Sometimes I wish your grip on my neck that day was a little tighter. You should have just lost control.
And most days I sit there wondering why the car just didn't slam into my door. He wouldn't have had to waste any more time with me.
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